Off to China… May 17, 2008

And because wordpress does not work in China (its banned!) I wont be able to blog.

I will watch what I eat and update my blog when I get back.

Have a wonderful week!

:)    Julia

Bursting with happiness… May 16, 2008

Ok, the healthy eating is still not 100% but I’ve seen a big improvement from last week.  Yesterday I went out for a real meal (by myself because everyone is away or busy) and ordered green veggies which were soooo good.      I’ve been daydreaming about the spinach and lentils I will be eating when I get back to New Zealand and I am genuinely looking forward to my stay in New Zealand.

Life is really good.   I really feel like I have turned an emotional corner and am feeling so much better about myself, my life and where it’s going.  I still realise I have more healing and development to do… but I am making fab progress.

One thing that I believe has made a big difference to my self confidence is listening to Louise Hays audio book ‘Self-esteem Affirmations: Motivational Affirmations for Building Confidence and Recognizing Self-worth’ on my ipod every night (I purchased and downloaded it from iTunes). 

The audio book is 1 hour and I usually fall asleep while listening to it… but I do believe its working.   I was a bit sceptical at first and I really didn’t like the music… but I stuck with it and I really do believe it’s made a big difference to my self-esteem and how I feel in the mornings.   

While the affirmations have been helping I have still had to work through a few issues that are going around in my head.   One message I keep getting from many places (books and Oprah) is that the thoughts we have in our head influence the events in our life… positive thoughts attract positive events.    I’ve been thinking about this and I really believe its true….  The areas in my life that aren’t going as well as I like them to are areas where I have a lot of self doubt and negative thoughts about.   This is something I am working on changing.

So, I am feeling really optimistic and am almost bursting with happiness (I can feel it in my tummy) – exciting times ahead… watch this space!  

I hope everyone is well and making good progress in their journey to a healthy and happier life.  :)   Have a wonderful weekend. 

Good WEDNESDAY morning! May 14, 2008

Good Wednesday morning - I honestly forgot to do my HYC weigh-in yesterday.   So I faced the music and jumped on the scales this morning… I’m back over 75kg and sitting at 75.4kg…. grrr.    

Er.. not really surprising given the ‘extended’ holiday and the amount of crap Ive been eating over the past 2 weeks.   :)   Oh well, I enjoyed it and now its time to get back to reality and continue to mission to loose 15kg (5kg down, 10 kg to go) and become a healthier, happier and thinner me.

I am very excited about the next phase of the HMC (healthy me challenge), the move to New Zealand.   Its going to be so fabulous to have access to the food I am familar with (the healthy stuff of course) and be able to get out and about easily (its too hot and polluted to walk much here).  My mission is going to be teaching myself how to cook.

I am going to buy myself some dark coloured walking shoes (that wont look naff with my dark business attire) and am going to add walking to my daily ‘get to work’ routine.    I will be saving money (for future travels) so I will bring my lunch to work x4/week and treat myself to bought lunch once a week.

I am also seriosly pondering spending $900 on a 12 week PT/Gym membership to kick start the ‘fit’ part of the new me.    The programme I am looking at is a 12 week program called Body Revolution - they are going to work me hard.  That is just what I need…. a supervised program and a trainer who will give me a kick up the arse!

But Julia… you didn’t use your old gym membership!   

I know… but this membership will be different… the gym is in the same building as my office, its a GREAT gym (Les Mills, they sell their classes around the world…  Body Pump, Body Jam, Body Balance…etc) and it will be winter in New Zealand so its the best time to do the gym thing.     Oh, and a few of my friends at work go to this gym so I suspect I will end up going to group classes with them… that will be fun.

Yes… well… that is where I am at at the moment…. I think I need to loose at least 90% of the rest of the weight before I head overseas again in September (not sure where I am going yet, its looking like China, South Korea or the UK)… so New Zealand is going to be a healthy and happy time for me.   I am going to see some fabulous results and I am very excited. 

And then she goes ominously quiet…. May 13, 2008

Hm… I wonder why!?!   

I don’t know why.  I think this is me being defiant and not wanting to play this game anymore.  Perhaps this is me not wanting to let go of ‘holiday mode’.  Perhaps this is me throwing my toys out of the cot. 

I think its me being defiant - you know, the skinny me says ‘buy salad’…  the defiant me who doesn’t like being told what to do says…. ‘nah, f*ck it, you know you wont actually eat the salad… buy some MM’s they are much yummier and oh so pretty and colourful’. 

I am sure this is just a temporary phase, I’ll be back, on form - tomorrow.

In the meantime I’m munching on MM’s while drinking diet coke….   and enjoying every single moment of it! 

Post Pizza - bring on a new day…. May 9, 2008

Hooray… you know what.  I am still fairly awesome….  I did only at ½ the mediam sized pizza (that’s 3 small pieces) and 3 bits of chicken.   Its still a lot of food but the old me would have polished the whole lot off and felt really ill  (I only felt a little bit ill due to the cheese).

Ok – so I do know it wasn’t the best of decisions to eat the pizza as its not in accordance with the loose another 10kg plan.   BUT…    its not all bad… I let myself enjoy the food and didn’t woolf it down in a guilt binge easting fest (like I probably would have in the old days)… I savored it.    And I know it won’t be happening again for quite some time (er…  what about the other 1/2 still in the fridge that is calling my name!?!).

Anyway… Today I am turning off the internet to my work PC (after posting this) and I am wearing my workout gear.  I am planning a 1hr power walk around lunchtime, I will listen to a podcast to take my mind of walking (either NYC Radio Lab or This American Life – great documentaries).   

 

Oh… and the pepsi…  its BAD…  it tasted yuck and I work up a few times in the night kind of sleep walking (I was on a mission to do something and woke up just as I was leaving my room).   It’s funny, I have just realized how much better my sleep is now I don’t drink diet coke like its going out of fashion.   I am usually asleep within 10mins of going to bed and sleep through the whole night.    Nice.